Monday, January 2, 2012

Truth in Advertising

Caveat emptor.
Or maybe more accurately, "Careful what you wish for."

The little jar of advanced formula eye cream promised me the world.
Ok, it promised me less noticeable fine lines & wrinkles under my eyes.
And, being a woman of a certain age (I'll address THAT little phrase another time) & more than a wee bit prone to both fine lines and vanity, figured, "Oooh, now that would be lovely!"

Well... I started the New Year with a whole new look.
Yes, the fine lines & wrinkles were much less apparent.
The whole problem with that was the reason they were less noticeable.
Unfortunately, it was, um, not exactly the look I was going for.

Think Darth Vader's eyes when Luke removes his mask during the death scene in Return of the Jedi.
(Hey, even geeks worry about their appearances.)
Think four movie chick-flick crying jag.
Think, I don't know, "What did the other guy look like?!"

Not only was the area under my eyes bright red, puffy & unbelievably irritated, it hurt like the Dickens!
On the up side, you hardly noticed those fine lines & wrinkles!

The fault, I'm thinking, was not so much with the cream, as I had used it before. More probably, it was the combination of things I had slathered on the night before in hopes of greeting the New Year with a fresh, young look.
You know, if one cream can promise results, think what might happen if you add in a little serum promised to give you a fresher, younger appearance! And maybe a few rolls of that anti-puffer stuff.
Apparently, I had started quite the little chemical reaction; a little "Dr. Jekyl" potion of my own creation with its own vile results.

Luckily, I also own lotions with the gentle words "hypo-allergenic" & "fragrance-free" on the labels.
A day of cold water compresses & tender application of soothing ointments calmed my Darth Vader look & made me fit to greet the world again, best face forward.

Well, best face with some noticeable fine lines & wrinkles.

And the sad thing is that, given the quick recovery, you know it won't be long until I try something else equally misguided again.